Hi,

I just returned from a whirlwind tour—from Paris to the French countryside to Barcelona—and went directly into a family trip.

Talk about a bit of culture shock.

But I was very intentional about returning to this environment because here’s the thing:

I wanted to see who I would be when I returned to the environment that knew the old version of me.

Could I sustain this next-level identity?

It’s really easy to be this new version of yourself in front of people who have never met you.

But what about the people who have known you since birth and already have ideas, expectations, and perceptions of who you are?

What I saw right away was that I really had to commit to this next-level, up-leveled version of me.

That meant having firm boundaries.

That meant taking time for me.

That meant honoring my voice.

That meant doing what I needed, even if it disappointed somebody else.

And it meant paying attention to what I needed to regulate my energy, my mindset, and my environment so that they worked for me.

As I stayed at my father’s home over the next month, surrounded by family, family obligations, friends, and people who have known me my whole life, I was also surrounded by people who had an idea of who I was that was different from the person I am right now.

And I really committed to her.

This is integration.

There were so many different instances when I had the opportunity to choose this new version of myself.

And what I saw blew me away.

If you, like me, have been a people pleaser, the nice girl, the yes girl, or the one who keeps the peace and goes along with things because it’s easier, then you’ll know what I mean.

My next-level identity—this upgraded version of me—killed the people-pleasing nice girl.

The peacekeeper is gone.

And what I knew that meant was that, for me to take care of myself and prioritize myself, I might have to disappoint somebody else.

I saw that on more than one occasion while I was home.

I had to breathe through it and let myself know:

It’s okay to choose me.

It’s okay to have needs.

And it’s okay to trust and know that my needs will be met.

That means I don’t need to cook every dinner.

I don’t need to be on cleanup duty.

I can trust that other people will fill in the gaps and take care of things.

The pressure, the expectation, and the role I’ve played—the belief that I need to be all of those things because “that’s just what we do in my family”—can change.

And that gets to start with me.

As you’ll notice at the bottom of all my letters, I say, “Rewrite the rules.”

That’s because I kept challenging the rules while I was home.

The rules I’ve lived by.

The rules I’ve made part of my identity.

And I started asking myself:

Is this a rule I still want to live by?

If I’m the creator of my reality and everything is mirroring me, then if I don’t like the rule—and I don’t like the identity tied to it—I have the power to change it.

Wow, was that liberating and beautiful.

And here, let me tell you the most beautiful part of this.

If you’re reading this and thinking, “I couldn’t do that,” or, “I don’t want to upset somebody,” or, “That’s just what we do in my family. That’s what’s expected of women,” I want you to know what I discovered:

The more I prioritized myself, the more respect I received.

The more I honored my boundaries, the more other people honored me and my boundaries.

The more I said yes to me, the more other people came to me and made an effort with me.

This is huge—and so counter to what we expect.

We’re programmed to believe that we have to be all things to all people.

That we must sacrifice or compromise ourselves, our needs, and our wants to keep the peace or take care of other people.

We put pressure on ourselves to do everything.

But do you know how beautiful and liberating it is to start letting go and allow other people to pick things up?

And they do.

You have to believe and trust that they will while understanding that not everything is on you.

Here is another journal prompt I have for you:

What rule are you living by that you no longer want to live by?

This was huge for me, too.

As we know, I’m the creator of my reality, as are you.

I started noticing this voice in my head saying:

“You’re not doing enough.”

“You need to be more visible.”

“You need to put out more content.”

“Why aren’t you launching something else?”

“You need to do more.”

And I stopped and said, “Wait. No, I don’t.”

I don’t like that belief.

And it’s counter to who I want to be and what I believe about money and success.

My beliefs around wealth and my business are that my success is inevitable, money loves me, and money comes to me easily and effortlessly—especially while I sleep, relax, have fun, and spend time with my family.

I noticed this other voice coming in and realized:

This isn’t the voice of truth. This is the voice of ego.

So, in that moment, I asked myself:

What if slowing down speeds up my manifestations?

What if slowing down actually brings me the greatest results because, in this season, I’m planting seeds, integrating, and setting the foundation for my next level of growth?

I started telling myself that the more present I am, the less I do, and the more intentional I am about what I do, the more opportunities come to me.

And wouldn’t you know it?

What do you think happened?

My reality mirrored me and mirrored my belief.

All of a sudden, opportunities started coming in.

An opportunity to do an event together in Europe came in.

Another product came to me in my sleep.

New clients and sales came in—again, in my sleep.

I received the download for and launched my new membership, The Portal, where I share monthly energy activations to support you in upgrading your frequency.