Do you have a dark side?

I used to not know what this was at all.

Then I didn’t like admitting that I had a dark side, because in the self-help world, I thought that meant I needed to be happy all the time, especially if I was spiritual.

I completely thought, “I can’t be a spiritual healer and have a dark side…”

Ummm, I was sooo sadly mistaken. And not knowing this piece of me, was costing me big time! It may be doing the same to you.

So here’s the deal.

You may be sitting there wondering…um, Melissa, what the hell is a “dark side” or you may be thinking, “I don’t really have one, I’m pretty happy”.

Well, a few things. One, we all have a dark side. Two, if you don’t know what it is, then you definitely aren’t connected to all of you, which means you’re not accepting all of you. We want to change that, which is why you’re here.

If you think having a “dark side” is a bad thing, then please read on, because if you’ve been struggling to stay committed, follow through or achieve many goals in life, including weight loss, this will help you big time!

Your dark side or shadow self is like any other part of you, the only difference…we don’t allow her to be seen, heard, felt or expressed very often, not without feeling massive guilt, shame or judgment…often times over-analyzing her and her emotions. By “her” I am referring to ourselves, the darker emotions we feel that we fear to express and shove down.

Many women hear these sides of themselves and shut them down.

Your shadow may be expressed and felt through these emotions (a few examples):















What’s unfortunate is, at an early age we’re taught to shut her down, to turn our backs on this side of ourselves. We make her wrong because she is not what we are told as girls, we should be:

Happy, perfect, quiet, conservative, pleasing, well-mannered, calm, agreeable…

Here’s the truth, we all have a dark side and it’s important to know her. She’s a piece of you, and if you aren’t in touch with her, this could be the very reason why you sabotage your weight loss and overall happiness and success in life.

She isn’t being loved, expressed, heard or acknowledged.

You’ve heard me talk about the inner rebel…

Remember when we spoke about self-acceptance a few weeks ago…this is full acceptance; it’s accepting all of you.

Your shadow or dark side and knowing her, inviting her in, asking her what she needs, these are just a few examples and ways of connecting with her and partnering with her.

Invite her on your journey, see what she needs and what information she has for you.

You dark side has answers for you, she has things she wants you to know.

This piece of you needs to be heard and expressed and until she is, she is working against you.

An example of this happened to me…

I was meditating, as I do most mornings, meeting with my future self, which activates future manifestations. But as I was in my bliss and deep in mediation, I heard this negative voice come up saying “you can’t have that…who are you kidding?”.

It was my dark side, my “shadow self” and she was angry and had LOTS to say…her voice was powerful.

So I did an internal process to partner with this piece of me and to get the wisdom she had for me to help me move forward with goals and release blocks that were holding me back.

Not only was I able to see a block I had, but I heard what my mind, heart and body needed for me to release fears and stay committed to myself and goals I’ve had.

See, no matter what happens in life, we always have to check in with ourselves. In fact, I make it a practice to do this several times a day, to see what I need and how I’m feeling and if I’m in flow or completely disconnected.

When you up-level in life, you will always be playing at a higher game, wanting more. As you do this, your dark side will always come out to challenge you. In this challenge you can be given the exact answers you need if you allow the shadow to show up and not shut her down and keep her out.

The bottom line, loving you is accepting all of you, there is beauty in all emotions and all emotions are reflections of the amazingness which is you!

Do you want to learn this process of partnering with my shadow self so you can do it too? If so, join me for Done With Dieting LIVE on Thursday at 4pm PT/6pm CT/7pm ET.

Go here

If you missed the last 2 weeks, simply go to my Facebook page and click the “Videos” section and they will be there for you to watch so you can get all caught up!

I’ll be taking you through my 3-Part process so you can release doubts, step into fear and achieve your goals.

I have a feeling this is the answer that you’ve been waiting for!

Radiantly Yours,


P.S. Woohoo! Done With Dieting 2.0 is back and starts on Monday Oct. 2nd! This is a No-Cost, online video series created just for you! It airs Oct. 2nd-12th but you have to register to watch, so go here now.